I still have to pay for dinner.
All that has changed is the moment.
I am still getting my head around this whole Shinsa thing. In a sense it is ( the mind part) really more of a challenge than hitting. Perhaps it is just that Yon-dan was my orginal goal for study target. After that target reached I had planned not to test again and just shoot, just because I could. Seek something more than Tai Kai and rank. Now I am at that door, although the goals have changed, and evolved.
Or, I have issues with the pass, fail thing. That is still something one has to deal with, well… That is if someone has an issue, some attachment with winning. I know someone who will not play games, because he does not want to lose. He can not handle it. That is one of those things the kyuhon speaks on, if the shot fails , do not blame others, look to yourself.
Anyway the pass/fail thing has many layers of gremlins.
Well, not important.
Day after tomorrow it will be over. I am still feeling zero confidence. I just has a sense Sept will be the turning point! I will turn down the burner on training and go to the dojo only once a week for awhile. Chill out some. I can still work my form at home. I have noticed when practicing everyone will give advice on my form, no one gives me advice on Hitting. Reason being I guess form is the answer. I will turn my next training section/quarter attention to that…yosh